i’m going to Brazil in 2 weeks. 2 WEEKS. crazy. i’m kind of really nervous because i know my portuguese is mediocre at best, and i have the hardest time making myself vulnerable and embarrassing myself, which is exactly what you have to do in order to actually learn and progress with a foreign language. i’m super excited about being there though. winter has always been my favorite, but i’m kind of intrigued by the idea of having almost an entire year of summer; it’s not something everyone gets to do, you know.
it seems more real now than it has so far in this entire process, but at the same time, it still feels sort of surreal. i’m not sure it will actually sink in until i’m surrounded by supermodels and incapable of expressing my thoughts. i’ve started making lists, but unfortunately i usually make them as i think of them which results in me having tons of lists in several different places and a substantial amount of them containing the same things written in different ways. needless to say, i love making lists, but rarely do they do me as much good as they should.
i hate packing. it’s just so miserable for me. i like to put everything in its own neat organized space (which by the way is quite impossible when you’re doing it weeks in advance) and i completely fail at deciding what needs to stay and what goes. for example, every summer for camp i have an entire small suitcase of just tee-shirts. “what’s the big deal? tee shirts are a staple of grungy camp life” you say; however, as staffers we already have a certain shirt we have to wear every day, and i know this. yet i never can seem to purge that suitcase. “what if tuesday i feel cerulean but wednesday i feel robin’s egg?!” i shout at the obese suitcase sitting in my floor as if it’s the suitcase and not my common sense that’s trying to persuade me to unpack at least 4 of the 12 blue shirts. plus even though the limit for my international flight is 2 suitcases no more than 70lbs each, my brazilian flight from rio to vitoria is however many suitcases you want 50lbs TOTAL. oh dear.
also urgent in my life is finishing christmas things and preparing my house for my departure. eek! anyone want to buy me a 2 week supply of sugar free rockstar?