It’s possible that I’ve talked about this before, but this week it seemed really applicable, and so if I have, oh well, I’m doing it again. I’ve had Brazil stuck in my head for the last few days in a bittersweet and melancholy sort of way, and in thinking about it I was trying to connect parts of that experience and lessons learned with what I’m doing and learning now. Here’s where I got.
In Brazil, because of the structure of their language, they say things like, “I am with hunger,” “I am with sadness,” or “I am with tiredness”. In the English language we just say “I am hungry,” “I am sad,” and “I am tired”. The temporary conditions we are in and the momentary afflictions, if you will, that we experience define us; I hate that. And even more than that I hate so much that we never really think about it. It doesn’t even occur to us that we are overly dramatic or that our attentions are misfocused; to ourselves we are normal.
This week at camp I was with exhaustion. I’m pretty sure my immune system was working overtime-one of my campers came to camp with a terrible, flu-like cold, and then several of my site kids that I do my best to hug and kiss every day were slightly under the weather as well-and it was week four. I was with exhaustion, yes, but I was joyful. I was excited. I am at peace. I never want to be defined by anything fleeting; I never want to be deluded by myself into thinking that what I have in Christ is ever mutable. Change is not inevitable in Christ in that sense because whatever I experience, He is, and wherever I find myself, He is, and whoever I get myself confused with, He still is.